Sunday, July 14, 2013

A new resolution

I'm not yet confident in my skills as a writer. It's all still feeling quite new for me. Because I'm not so confident I've asked two people who know I'm working on this WIP to read what I've written. However I found that the comments they would come back with was really affecting my writing and my need to get the story out.

While one would simply say, I don't like this part, the other would ask the small questions that I hadn't even thought of and certainly weren't necessary to think of in the first draft. But I'd look at their questions and comments and panic. I'd say if these questions are coming up now and I can't answer them, or I'm giving the answer they don't want to hear, then my book isn't going to work. The story isn't going to be right.

Consequently I would stop writing. I'd stop for a few days or a week and then I'd usually delete huge sections. Then I'd feel deflated. I'd think I couldn't do it and that I'd never be good enough.

I know they didn't mean for their comments to have that affect on me, but I was so desperate for my story to be....right. I wanted their approval with what I was writing, I wanted them to like what was written on those pages. I'm not saying they didn't, but there were aspects that needed work, or questions that were raised that they wanted to bring up with me.

Eventually I sat back and said to myself, I'm writing this story for me. It's my story and these bits this person is telling me to include or exclude will totally change the vision I have for it. I need to do what's right for me to get this story told. I need to do whatever I can to get the first draft complete, then I can hear what they have to say.

To do this I had to basically cut them off from my story. I don't talk about the content with them much anymore, and I definitely don't send them chapters. They understand, which I'm grateful for, and for the moment that is definitely what is best for me and my WIP. Since I stopped worrying about the comments they'd make and the questions they'd raise, the ideas poured into my brain and helped the story form in my mind. Now i'm more on track than ever.

I've asked a lot of people for help getting past my roadblocks over the past month or so, and I thank you all for your advice. Every piece of advice I was given, I've kept, and I use when I need inspiration. It turned out for me though, the way to really open the dam and let the ideas flow was to get rid of the external forces and to write this story on my own.

It's scary, but I really think it's going to be worth it! 


  1. There are those who have no problem with people reading chapters of their first draft for feedback. I'm not one of them, and I'm in good company. That first draft is where you figure out the story for yourself. You develop the characters, craft the voice, find out whether the plot you had in mind will really work. It's your vision. I'm not comfortable sharing that. After a few edits, when I've had a chance to get the story in the form I want it, then, and only then, I'll bring in others to read it.

    It sounds like you need that initial freedom to write what you want, too. :)

    1. I think I need to take a leaf out of your book. I should've known from the start that I needed to write my book without any outside influences. I need to tell my story first, opinions and suggestions can come later